Today we talk about the science behind why people might say things and not really mean it!
Science class comes in handy here. Do you remember talking about the sympathetic nervous system? Your fight or flight system? The opposite, or relaxed state of your sympathetic nervous system, is your parasympathetic state. That’s the CALM state. Your biggest asset in parasympathetic dominance is your FULL brain functioning. Your frontal lobe is “offline” when you’re in a fight or flight state AND this can be triggered with BOTH real AND perceived threat.
Sooooo, even when your spouse is not really a threat your brain tricks you into believing they’re the saber toothed tiger and in kind shifts you out of frontal lobe functioning into your hind brain for survival purposes. Your frontal lobe is for higher order thinking like consequential thinking, fine tune details and rational thinking. It’s where authenticity, connection, vulnerability and being attuned to others happens. So, when you’re “offline” in the frontal lobe you’re not rationally speaking, acting or behaving. Take a deep breathe, notice you’re out of “full functioning” and get your whole self back “online” for authentic, attuned engagement with those around you. Watch this video for more about this concept!
Make sure you’re on my list to be notified when enrollment opens for my membership course: 6 steps to taking control where we’ll dive deep into how our brains work, how they trick us and what we can do to live more authentic and peaceful lives with meaningful relationships. Go to takecontrolwithbeckie.com to get on our email list for our newsletters, information and more along with a freebie on how to grab hold when you’re spiraling out of control.